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Thank You.

by Jeff Sherman of OnMilwaukee.com

Willy Porter was kind enough to drop off a copy of his soon-to-be-released seventh disc, "How to Rob a Bank," (June 2, Weasel Records) this week. I'm working on a full review, so watch for it soon. It's, as you'd expect, powerful, tight and emotional stuff.

It's also, in typical Porter style, a bit playful. One tune, the super-Dylanesque title track, is an anthem-type song that could -- given its relevant, creative nature -- make its way down the road that John Rich's stick-it-to-the-man song of the economic crisis, "Shutting Detroit Down," has paved.

Rich's tune, one of biggest country songs today, takes shots at auto executives crying on TV as he sings: "Pardon me if I don't shed a tear/'Cause they're selling make-believe and we don't buy that here."

Porter's "How to Rob a Bank," is a bit more playful and creative, but yet echoes a similar sentiment that could propel it into stardom.

An investment banker friend of mine recently heard Porter do the tune live in Boulder, Colo. He loved it and said that many at the show were talking about it afterwards and sheepishly laughing at the lyrics like, "I'm gonna secure myself a seat on the board of directors first. That's how you rob a bank."

Milwaukee's Porter, who has remained happily under the mainstream music radar for much of his 20-year career, might just have a huge, stimulus-style hit on his hands.

What do you think? The lyrics are below. You can listen to the song here.

How to Rob a Bank, by Willy Porter
Some say I'll need a driver, a Nixon mask and gun
But let me tell you brothers and sisters that's not how you get a bank job done
You can't walk in there brazen with an Uzi like Patty Hearst
I'm gonna secure myself a seat on the board of directors first
That's how you rob a bank

I'll get some decent suits and a bogus business plan
Become well-versed in the etiquette of Wall Street Disney Land
Hit the country clubs eating peanuts and drinking Scotch
I'll talk the recent trends and fart into a velvet couch
That's how you rob a bank

I'll get a foundation to give me thanks
I'll give my congressman a wank
Apologize for all I drank when I pulled that goldfish from the tank
And gave those debutantes a spank
That's how you rob a bank

Then I'll cry to congress that I just can't survive
After giving loans to folks for homes they can't afford to buy
And building useless cars that no one wants to buy
Then I'll threaten massive lay-offs just like blackmail in disguise
That's how you rob a bank

My family won't judge me
They'll accept the gifts I send
Even though it's not my money, that doesn't mean I shouldn't spend
As the dough piles up like snow in Switzerland
I'll smile as the Feds come take me in

And with an army of lawyers I'll soon outflank
And spin the tale of how my ship sank
I'll get my bonus and give my thanks
That's how you rob a bank

I'll say truth in lending is a two-way street
Wall Street put the fire to my feet
The SEC never even took a peek
Blame it all on unchecked greed in a time of war
That's how you rob a bank

Original article at:

http://www.onmilwaukee.com/music/articles/howtorobbank.html

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